Function of (X) - A Very Scientific Blog

Something to whet your appetite

2009-04-13T22:02:00.003-04:00

Until I get posting again, here's something from the archives. I figure this is old enough that most of my readers haven't seen it.

Major credit to Grant Jordan. Enjoy.

Yet another comic-less informational post

2009-04-09T18:08:00.001-04:00

timdudley.net

Poke around until I start posting again, which will happen soon - I promise.

F of (X) Quarterly Update

2009-03-30T10:03:00.002-04:00

No graph today.

Reason 1: my apartment is without internet (I'm posting this from my office), but hopefully that problem will be fixed by tonight.

Reason 2: I've been putting most of my effort (a.k.a. the time spent laying in bed before I fall asleep) into a new website that I hope to launch within the next week. Stay tuned, as I intend heavily and shamelessly promote that site through this one.

-tim

Age Relativity, part 2

2009-03-25T23:07:00.001-04:00

It's almost Thursday. But better late than never.

17 is the new 21, and 60 is the new 12.

2009-03-23T19:15:00.003-04:00

Nice pants, they'd look better...

2009-03-20T07:12:00.004-04:00

I'm way behind on flowcharts, so here's a Friday graph to keep you happy until next week.

On truth in advertising

2009-03-18T08:05:00.000-04:00

Like an ironic Nobel

2009-03-16T07:28:00.001-04:00

It's not plagarism if you give credit

2009-03-09T10:29:00.001-04:00

Long story short: my laptop blows. I'm sick of waiting for it to load paint / photoshop (yes, it's gotten that bad). My new laptop is coming in the mail today. Once it arrives I'm going to start work on the 20+ comic ideas I've been accumulating during my hiatus. So don't lose hope.

Yet it's still better than MTV

2009-03-04T07:28:00.002-05:00

On a need-to-know basis

2009-03-02T22:25:00.000-05:00

Drunk, actually

2009-02-25T07:10:00.001-05:00

One size fits, well...

2009-02-23T07:19:00.001-05:00

Function of (X) is not dead

2009-02-20T07:40:00.001-05:00

Just sleeping.

New posts very soon.

a/s/l?

2009-02-11T07:31:00.000-05:00

On the biggest Lost mystery

2009-02-09T07:38:00.001-05:00

Audio Thresholds

2009-02-04T19:41:00.001-05:00

How to succeed on the internet without really trying

2009-02-02T07:12:00.000-05:00

My work behavior model

2009-01-30T07:39:00.000-05:00

A + B = C

2009-01-28T07:34:00.003-05:00

On Thermodynamics

2009-01-26T07:22:00.001-05:00

A guide to watching Lost

2009-01-23T07:37:00.001-05:00

Update: stuff you probably won't notice, and one thing you will

2009-01-22T22:05:00.002-05:00

So, I started looking at Function of (X) on someone else's monitor, and I realized something that I'm a little embarrassed to admit it took me this long to realize: my graphs have some horrible aliasing. I use microsoft paint for everything, and - big surprise - their jpeg compression isn't all that hot. So, starting today, I'm working my way backwards cleaning up the images and converting everything to png. So if you notice things start to look prettier around here, that's it.

I also threw a watermark on there just in case anyone ever feels like hotlinking from here.

And, at long last, flow charts start tomorrow.

Peace.

On cyberdemographics

2009-01-21T07:33:00.002-05:00

On what they don't tell you until it's too late

2009-01-19T11:29:00.002-05:00

I'm on to their scheme

2009-01-16T07:22:00.003-05:00

On slippery slopes

2009-01-14T07:41:00.002-05:00

Update: catch-up, and what's (maybe) new for '09

2009-01-12T20:44:00.002-05:00

Update: today's comic is late because I had a busy birthday weekend (send money). You might also notice I didn't publish Friday. That's because I accidentally skipped a day a few weeks ago. I went back and inserted it, and bumped everything else up - have fun trying to find the new one.

Also, I've been toying with the idea of adding something new to the site, just to keep things from getting too monotonous. How do y'all feel about flowcharts? I've got a few sketched out, and I'll be sticking them in every couple Fridays from here on. If you have anything to say about that, please drop a comment... let me know you're reading this and give me some motivation to keep publishing.

And wish me a happy birthday tomorrow.

The opposite of watched pots never boiling

2009-01-12T20:39:00.003-05:00

On biting social satire vs. ubiquitous culture references, and fart jokes for all

2009-01-09T07:07:00.001-05:00

On Candy Demographics

2009-01-07T07:18:00.001-05:00

The rules of the road, free market version

2009-01-05T10:45:00.001-05:00

What a stupid sounding word

2009-01-02T11:50:00.000-05:00

On deadlines

2008-12-31T08:35:00.001-05:00

Unoriginality: the Christmas Constant

2008-12-26T10:49:00.002-05:00

The days of Christmas - Part 2

2008-12-24T12:05:00.002-05:00

The days of Christmas - Part 1

2008-12-22T07:29:00.002-05:00

The Funny Scale

2008-12-19T07:18:00.001-05:00

On 'Drawn Doe'

2008-12-17T07:27:00.001-05:00

The Horticultural Divide

2008-12-15T07:37:00.002-05:00

On Biggienomics

2008-12-12T08:39:00.002-05:00

Comedy cost benefit

2008-12-10T07:39:00.001-05:00

On efficiency and shoes

2008-12-08T07:33:00.003-05:00

You can't have your cake and drink it too

2008-12-05T07:36:00.001-05:00

On the emperor's new clothes of fast food

2008-12-03T07:28:00.003-05:00

*(from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pizza_Hut#Products)

Pizza Hut also sells Stuffed Crust pizza, with the outermost edge wrapped around a coil of mozzarella cheese; Hand-Tossed, more like traditional pizzeria crusts; Thin 'N Crispy, a thin, crispy dough which was Pizza Hut's original style; Dippin' Strips pizza, a pizza cut into small strips that can be dipped into a number of sauces; and The Edge pizza, where the toppings nearly reach to the edge of the pizza. There is a crust that is not as thick as its pan pizza, and not as thin as its thin crust, used on the Full House XL pizza, discontinued in 2007.[4]

Pizza Hut experiments with new products frequently, with less successful ones being discontinued. These include the initially popular two-foot by one-foot square cut pizza Bigfoot, the 16" Big New Yorker, made with a sweet sauce few enjoyed, the Chicago Dish Pizza and Sicilian pizza, the latter also offered in 2006 as Lasagna Pizza. Other products Pizza Hut has offered are the "P'zone", Pizza Hut's version of the calzone; the Cheesy Bites pizza, similar to the Stuffed Crust pizza except the crust has been divided into bite-sized pieces that can be pulled apart; and the Insider pizza, where a layer of cheese is in between two layers of dough. Another limited time offer was a Double Deep pizza with double the toppings and 50% more cheese, with the crust wrapped over the top to hold in all the toppings.

The Function of (X) Post-Thanksgiving Holiday Extravaganza (great job!)

2008-12-01T22:20:00.003-05:00

As penance for blowing off all of last week, here are a whole bunch of graphs that I thought of during and shortly after Thanksgiving dinner. Enjoy

And since apparently Christmas begins as soon as you take the Turkey out of the oven on Thanksgiving...

Back to normal on Wednesday...

These aren't the posts you're looking for

2008-11-26T07:19:00.001-05:00

About that... I don't have a mouse, and it's really hard to use paint with this stupid track pad.

Sorry.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Function of (0)

2008-11-25T19:51:00.004-05:00

I've been rather delinquent this week, but fear not, I haven't given up on this thing yet. Expect a new post when you wake up tomorrow, and at the regularly scheduled times after that.

In news, I recently passed 200 graphs. I'm pretty proud of myself for that, I honestly never thought this site would last more than a month, and here I am looking at its one year birthday in a few weeks. Thanks to everyone for actually reading this (all ~30 of you). Tell all your friends. My motivation to post is directly proportional to the number of daily hits I receive (damn, I just wasted a graph idea).

Speaking of one year, I'm toying with the idea of doing something new to commemorate 365 days of F of (X). If any readers out there have any thoughts about a direction that you'd like to see this site go in... please let me know. I'll post again about this when it gets closer to the new year.

In other news, I'm considering going back through all my posts and adding some kind of category / tag so the site is more easily searchable (and easier to accidentally find through search engines). Maybe that'll generate some traffic.

This concludes your semi-yearly update.

On the only good thing left about suburbia

2008-11-19T07:12:00.002-05:00

On why it's best to just call grandma

2008-11-17T07:13:00.003-05:00

On Commuter Fluid Dyanamics

2008-11-14T07:44:00.002-05:00

Do all doctors talk like that?

2008-11-12T07:20:00.002-05:00

On Drunk Dial for the New Millennium

2008-11-10T07:42:00.002-05:00

On 'Marketing', not Exploitation

2008-11-07T07:44:00.002-05:00

What's the opposite of a hangover?

2008-11-05T19:03:00.003-05:00

On the new equal-time rule

2008-11-03T07:47:00.002-05:00

On what you're doing tonight

2008-10-31T07:41:00.003-04:00

When the going gets tough, the losers get bitchy

2008-10-29T18:46:00.002-04:00

On fooling myself into thinking the day is half over

2008-10-27T07:41:00.003-04:00

We don't know what it is, but we know what it isn't

2008-10-24T07:47:00.002-04:00

On maternal instinct or sexism?

2008-10-22T07:53:00.002-04:00

On the new Green Party

2008-10-20T07:52:00.003-04:00

Better Late than Never

2008-10-17T22:27:00.003-04:00

On the sincerest form of flattery

2008-10-15T07:42:00.002-04:00

I'm not above admitting I'm out of ideas

2008-10-13T09:00:00.004-04:00

Rather than forcing myself to update daily, and subjecting the world to my half-cooked or rushed ideas, I'm going to cut back to 3 updates a week. So from here on, it's quality, not quantity. Let's hope I can keep with that.

Function of (X) will be updated on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday mornings until further notice

On Proportional Piracy

2008-10-09T07:54:00.001-04:00

On the most important meal of the day, and what follows

2008-10-07T06:44:00.002-04:00

On responsibility vs. bacon & eggs

2008-10-06T18:26:00.001-04:00

On fashion statements, or lack thereof

2008-10-04T10:35:00.003-04:00

On barely noticable annoyances

2008-10-03T22:30:00.002-04:00

On Situationless Comedy

2008-10-02T17:37:00.002-04:00

What 1 in 5 americans already knows*

2008-10-01T07:45:00.003-04:00

* (http://www.cdc.gov/std/herpes/STDFact-herpes.htm#common)

On slingshot capitalism

2008-09-30T07:49:00.002-04:00

On the slow death of media creativity

2008-09-29T07:45:00.002-04:00

On the new 15 minutes of fame

2008-09-28T10:40:00.001-04:00

References to other comics week: Day 7

2008-09-27T11:54:00.002-04:00

References to other comics week: Day 6

2008-09-26T07:47:00.002-04:00

References to other comics week: Day 5

2008-09-25T07:58:00.002-04:00

References to other comics week: Day 4

2008-09-24T07:53:00.001-04:00

References to other comics week: Day 3

2008-09-23T07:28:00.002-04:00

References to other comics week: Day 2

2008-09-22T07:29:00.003-04:00

References to other comics week: Day 1

2008-09-21T10:20:00.002-04:00

The F of (X) Observational Driving Constant

2008-09-20T10:13:00.002-04:00

On the usual cause of panic

2008-09-19T07:20:00.002-04:00

Guess who's on top?

2008-09-18T07:38:00.001-04:00

Even nerds must get day jobs

2008-09-17T07:33:00.002-04:00

On optimal beard length

2008-09-16T07:30:00.001-04:00

On things no one told me

2008-09-15T07:32:00.002-04:00

...part 2

2008-09-14T14:07:00.001-04:00

On television for goldfish

2008-09-13T12:12:00.001-04:00

On 'high' fashion

2008-09-12T07:40:00.002-04:00

Time heals all wounds

2008-09-11T07:59:00.001-04:00

Special Jobs for Special People

2008-09-10T07:48:00.002-04:00

The World According to McCain

2008-09-09T07:47:00.002-04:00

On the Competition

2008-09-08T07:40:00.003-04:00

On New Beginnings

2008-09-03T12:29:00.004-04:00

Given the theme of this comic, anything but brevity would be unfair, so:

This summer I traveled a lot, then moved from Boston to DC. I didn't really have the time or the internet access to keep up with F of (X). But now I'm settled; I've got a new place and a new wireless network; and I've got plenty of ideas for new comics. So let's give this another try, shall we?

Function of (X) will reopen for business on Monday, September 8

On personalization vs. copy+paste

2008-07-16T13:39:00.002-04:00

Just like a real band

2008-07-15T14:19:00.002-04:00

On Muscle Control

2008-07-14T09:36:00.001-04:00

On 'campus invasion'

2008-07-13T11:22:00.003-04:00